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Tubal Ligation Regret
March 15th, 2011 | 
Author: By Kristi, Contributor, Live and Love… Out Loud (@tweetingmama)
Two years ago, I was completely confident in my decision to undergo a tubal ligation. As a matter of fact, the decision to do so was somewhat of a relief. Never mind that I was backed into a corner by fear and uncertainty. As far as decisions go, choosing permanent birth control by way of tubal ligation was one of the easiest decisions I’ve had to make. But living with this life-altering decision, coming to terms with my personal reasons for doing so and working through the regret that ensued have proven to be difficult.
Facts About Tubal Ligation
Source: http://www.infobarrel.com/Tubal_ligation_vs_Vasectomy
Tubal ligation is the second most popular form of birth control among women in the United States. TL’s are typically performed on women over the age of 30 who have no desire to bear additional children. A tubal ligation is a relatively simple 30 minute procedure in which the fallopian tubes are cauterized, tied and cut, banded or blocked – preventing a woman’s eggs from being fertilized. Tubal ligations are 99.5% effective in preventing pregnancy and are performed on more than 650,000 women in the U.S. each year. Approximately 10% of these women will later regret their choice to undergo a tubal ligation. I’m one of them.
My Personal Reasons for Undergoing Tubal Ligation
My reasons for undergoing a tubal ligation were laced with fear. Two years ago, Diastasis Symphisis Pubis had moved in, set up shop and taken complete control over my body just several months into my pregnancy. DSP – a painful condition in which the body’s over-production of Relaxin loosens the ligaments that hold one’s pelvic joint together – left me physically and emotionally exhausted. Imagine if you will, the excruciating pain of a belly burgeoning with life stretching and pushing against an unstable, gaping pelvic joint. My 34 year old body was broken; requiring the aid of a walker and toward the end, a wheelchair. Diastasis Symphisis Pubis had a profound impact on my life, specifically my role as a wife and mother. I became completely dependent on my husband, requiring his assistance with everything from shifting in bed to showering to preparing meals. The burden of running a household and caring for our children fell in my husband’s lap and our children missed their once active mother. To say that DSP turned our family’s life upside down would be an understatement. The probability of DSP’s more aggressive return in subsequent pregnancies in addition to the possibility of no recovery post childbirth, were motivating factors in my decision to seek permanent birth control via tubal ligation. In mind and in my heart, my fallopian tubes had to be cut.
Living with Tubal Ligation Regret
Following the birth of my daughter, the painful effects of DSP slowly began to fade and left in its wake, a feeling of deep regret. The truth is, I made a horrible mistake. I thought only of the pain I endured and the burden I had become when weighing my options prior to the tubal ligation. I thought nothing of providing a playmate for my young child. Hormonal imbalances, heavy periods and terrible PMS were the furthest thing from mind at the time. And more importantly, I failed to consider the effect that the loss of my ability to bear children would have on my heart.
I’d sold my child-bearing ability to the devil and paid him to remove it. In the time it takes to watch your favorite sitcom on television, my fertility was taken away. In just 30 minutes, the fear of a lifetime of pain at the hands of DSP vanished. In just 30 minutes, the hassle of dealing with contraceptives and birth control pills were no more. In just 30 minutes, my fertility was gone. No more contraceptives. No more birth control. No more pain and no more living in fear of disability at the hands of DSP. And sadly, no more babies.
Learning to Heal
Whether or not my husband and I would have chosen to expand our family again in the future, my ability to carry life within me and bring it forth into the world was taken away at my choosing. The very thing I was created for, my purpose in this life, is gone and I’ve no one to blame but myself. Each and every day I live with the regret of my decision and the emptiness within. But coming to terms with my personal reasons for undergoing a tubal ligation, working through the regret of my decision and mourning the loss of my ability to bear children, though difficult, is important in healing the part of me that hurts. My ability to bring life into our world may have been taken away in just 30 minutes, but I have an entire lifetime to heal from the regret of choosing to undergo a tubal ligation.
Each year 650,000 women choose to undergo tubal ligation in the U.S. alone; 10% of those women eventually go on to regret it. I know I’m not alone. Have you undergone a tubal ligation? Have you experienced feelings of regret in your decision to do so?
Kristi is navigating her way through the triumphs and challenges of motherhood and marriage while living it up, loving out loud and laughing it off at Live and Love… Out Loud.
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You dont mention specifically what kind of tubal ligation you had. My mother had one after my youngest sister was born. – My sister is 21 now but my mother had it reversed about 7 years ago because she decided to try to have another child much later.The reversal was successful but they did not end up having more children (the problem was complicated by slow moving sperm and an older uterus).
I think this is an important article and you are so brave for sharing your struggle – but there are options, while difficult for reversal even for a total cut from what I understand and I wish this had been discussed here – maybe there could be a part two?
Whoops! Adrianne, I replied to your comment but forgot to click the correct link so that my reply would go to your inbox. To see the reply, please stop on by Our Mommyhood. Sorry about that! Thanks so much for your comment. Have a great day.
Kristi, Live and Love Out Loud
@TweetingMama
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I also had a Tubal.. the kind where you cauterize the tube. I have four healty boys and yet I constantly regret that decison. Sigh.
I just don’t think I was ready to give up the part of my life where I was fertle. Baby, pregnancy, or not. It is a very emotional decison.
Thank you for sharing your story and the facts!
Jennifer
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Hi Adrianne,
Thanks so much for taking the time to comment on my tubal ligation post here at Our Mommyhood. To answer your question, an open tubal ligation (laparotomy) was performed immediately following my c-section. My tubes were cut and cauterized. According to my OBGYN, it was the more permanent form of birth control compared to the other tubal ligation options.
You make an excellent point about reversals as an option to consider for those wanting to restore their childbearing ability. It’s something I chose not to discuss this time around as I wanted to focus on my regrets about the tubal ligation itself, but I may consider writing about my personal feelings surrounding reversal in the future. Thanks for suggesting that!
Kristi, Live and Love Out Loud
@TweetingMama
Kristi {at} Live and Love Out Loud´s last blog ..Little Miss Mustang and a Possible Midlife Crisis
What a beautiful and moving story. I’m 97% positive that the child I’m carrying will be our last, but that 3% keeps me from taking permanent steps to prevent a pregnancy. I love the idea of no more worries and life free from hormonal controls, but what if we really feel strongly that there is another one? Thanks for sharing your story.
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Carina,
You certainly are wise for not wanting to take permanent birth control measures at this point. That little part of you that’s unsure could possibly want another baby sometime down the road. I wish someone had shared something like this with me when I was thinking about undergoing a tubal ligation.
Thanks for stopping by and taking the time to comment. Congratulations on the upcoming birth of your baby. How wonderful!
Kristi, Live and Love Out Loud
@TweetingMama
Kristi {at} Live and Love Out Loud´s last blog ..Little Miss Mustang and a Possible Midlife Crisis
I have not undergone this procedure, but I thought about it. To be completely honest, I’ve had three pregnancies and three vaginal deliveries. I wasn’t about to have a vaginal delivery and then be cut open for the procedure and I didn’t want to have a c-section just to have my tubes tied. Was that selfish? I don’t think so. My husband will be finishing school at the end of the year. Our hopes are that he can secure a great job and I can quit mine to stay home. This is my dream! I’d also love to have another child. I never thought I’d say that. I thought I was finished after #2. Now? I’m not so sure I’ll be finished after #4. Your situation is unique in that you had a very unbearable medical reason to do what you did. I wish I had the words to make you feel okay about that decision.
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Pam,
Though some tubal ligations can be performed laporoscopically, it’s far less invasive for men to undergo a vasectomy. It’s a good thing you opted to have had nothing done since you’re clearly not done having children. I really wish I’d taken more time to consider my decision, preferably after I had healed from the diastasis pubis.
Thanks for stopping by and taking the time to read on comment on my post here at Our Mommyhood, Pam. You’re so sweet. I always appreciate your feedback and honesty. Have a great day.
Kristi, Live and Love Out Loud
@TweetingMama
Kristi {at} Live and Love Out Loud´s last blog ..Little Miss Mustang and a Possible Midlife Crisis
I had a similar procedure for entirely different reasons. What flabbergasted me is that when I went to see a doctor (who was covered by my insurance) to discuss the procedure that would permanent and irreversible, the whole appointment lasted 5 minutes. No counselling, no discussion about this being the right decision for me. It left me speechless.
The upside: I have since been able to get pregnant via IVF.
I certainly have my regrets (it was my behavior in my college years that led to the need for the procedure and the 10′s of thousands of dollars it cost to have a family) but at the end of the day I am grateful for the result: my life and my child (children).
Don’t let my remarks downplay my feelings: I understand and feel the pain of your regret. It was brave of you to share this.
Thank you so much for taking the time to comment, Mad Woman. I’m glad to hear that a reversal worked for you. It doesn’t always work so I’m always thrilled to hear about folks who’ve had children following a reversal.
The fact that many doctors don’t spend enough time counseling patients, digging deeper for the underlying reasons in their desire to seek permanent birth control solutions, is downright disturbing. Believe it or not, I have a friend who underwent a tubal ligation shortly after she graduated from high school because she didn’t want to have children. I find it alarming that a doctor would perform such a procedure on someone who has yet to really live.
Thanks again for stopping by and sharing your thoughts! Have a great day.
Kristi, Live and Love Out Loud
@TweetingMama
Kristi {at} Live and Love Out Loud´s last blog ..Little Miss Mustang and a Possible Midlife Crisis
Hi,
Just to clarify: I did not have a reversal. My children were conceived via IVF. As strange as it sounds, I was unable to have children naturally and one of the reasons was related to my fallopian tubes. Tubal ligation resolved part of the problem.
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I had a tubal ligation 10 and a half years ago. The day after my youngest son was born. At the time I did it because I did not want any more children with my children’s father. He was horribly abusive and I thought I would be stuck with him forever… before my son was one I finally got the courage to leave him for good… now I am married to a man who has no children of his own and I cannot provide that.
I regret my decision. I made a permanent decision to a temporary problem. Granted at the time I was not in my right mind, but having 2 children less than a year apart and being with an abusive person will do that to you. I feel horrible and stupid for making the decision I did.
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Laura, I don’t blame you for making the decision to undergo a tubal ligation. Had I been in the your shoes I probably would’ve made the same choice. I’m sorry that you’re not able to give your new husband a biological child of his own, but I am so proud of you for leaving an abusive relationship.
I can’t tell you how much appreciate you sharing your story with me…
Kristi, Live and Love Out Loud
@TweetingMama
Kristi {at} Live and Love Out Loud´s last blog ..Little Miss Mustang and a Possible Midlife Crisis
[...] been 23 months now, but I still regret my decision to undergo a tubal ligation following the birth of my [...]
I did not have this, but my mother had after my brother was born. She had been on bedrest for the last 3 months due to placenta previa and my brother was born w a cleft pallet.
The drs told her that it would be the best decision for her and she regrets it. She has told me several times how she wished she had more children.
imperfect momma´s last blog ..Taking a Moment of Silence
Having to endure bed rest during pregnancy can be so stressful and add to that having a child with special needs as well? I can’t say that I blame your mother for undergoing a tubal ligation after a difficult pregnancy. Obviously, I made the same decision. I just wish that I’d thought beyond the complications I experienced during my pregnancy.
Thanks for sharing your mom’s story with me Imperfect Momma. I appreciate you stopping by to read my post here at Our Mommyhood. I hope your pregnancy is going well!
Kristi {at} Live and Love Out Loud´s last blog ..Little Miss Mustang and a Possible Midlife Crisis
I have not had one yet, but just having our 3rd child it was the next BIG decision on our plate. This post certainly makes me think more deeply about the situation and puts things into perspective for me. What if in the future we change our minds and have another? I think the hassle of birth control just might be worth the alternative. If that happens to fail maybe there were other plans from someone way higher than us and who’s to argue with THAT Guy?! Thanks for putting your thoughts out there, Kristi! So sorry about your struggles and pain before and after the decision.
I think it’s very wise of you to really think things through before resorting to a permanent form of birth control. With a newborn in the house, it would be easy to say “that’s it, we’re done”. But you are so right Tayarra, you just might change your mind somewhere down the line. Or God might have other plans.
I hope all’s going well with those beautiful boys of yours. Take care, Tayarra.
Thanks for stopping by and taking the time to comment on my tubal ligation post here at Our Mommyhood. I really appreciate that.
Kristi, Live and Love Out Loud
@TweetingMama
Kristi {at} Live and Love Out Loud´s last blog ..Little Miss Mustang and a Possible Midlife Crisis
What a great and honest post. Thanks for sharing your story. I can’t imagine the pain of DSP–I had a lesser but similar problem (pubis symphesis and then related iliosacral problems), which was really painful and took a long time to completely heal. (Thank god for a good chiropractor who specializes in it.)
For many reasons, I think I don’t want more kids. My husband refuses to get a vasectomy just yet, and I think a TL is too invasive and permanent for me right now. He thinks after my postpartum depression fully goes away I may want more children. I don’t think so, but it’s good to be reminded that maybe we should really think hard about permanent measures.
Thank you.
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Not Like a Cat,
I think it’s safe to say that you’re due for a vacation sometime soon!
I’m sorry to hear that you had a rough pregnancy as well. And postpartum depression on top of it?
Though you may feel strongly against having more children in the future, it’s a good thing that the option is there should you have a change of heart. Taking permanent measures should never be done out of fear. It’s a lesson I learned the way.
Thanks so much for sharing your story with me here at Our Mommyhood. Wishing you the best of luck with PPD…
Kristi, Live and Love Out Loud
@TweetingMama
Kristi {at} Live and Love Out Loud´s last blog ..Little Miss Mustang and a Possible Midlife Crisis
I also had DSP with my last pregnancy, although not nearly as bad as you did.
I am really surprised that only 10% of women have regrets after a tubal. I thought it would be a much higher percentage. I’m not one to heap blame on doctors, but I do believe there should be more counseling and informing before this procedure.
I had a TL after my third child was born 10 years ago. Two years later, my children’s father and I separated and then divorced. Two years after that, I married a man with only one living child who would have loved to have more children. We have a great, big family and he does consider my kids his own, but still….I would have loved to have one child with him.
I’m over it now and I do enjoy our kids being older, not having a little one to chase after, having a lot of couple time. But more than anything, I regret that I had no choice (other than an expensive and not guaranteed to work reversal). I was NOT able to choose to have another child, because I had taken that option away from myself.
I was surprised by the low tubal ligation regret statistic as well! I totally agree with you in that doctors should provide more counselling and information prior to performing tubal ligation. I wish I’d read stories about other women’s regret. I may have chosen differently.
I’m sorry to hear that you were unable to have a child with your husband after remarrying. In reading your story, I’m reminded that I really should be grateful that my new husband and I were able to have one child together before my tubal ligation. I’m hoping that someday I’ll come to turns with my decision like you have.
Thanks so much for sharing your story with me, Dysfunctional Mom. I appreciate you taking the time to leave a comment. Have a great day.
Kristi, Live and Love Out Loud
@TweetingMama
Kristi {at} Live and Love Out Loud´s last blog ..Little Miss Mustang and a Possible Midlife Crisis
I would think that a Tubal Ligation could be bypassed by direct harvesting of the eggs from the ovaries. I know that I maybe considered an out sider here but I do have very strong feelings about sterilization for birth control whether for men or women.
I have a number of friends who have husbands who from vasectomy or low and damaged sperm count have been unable to conceive. These friends at first only one but within her pregnancy work of mouth I start being asked to donate sperm to them.
All I can say is that just not women but men have to be desperate to allow another man father their child. Sterilization should never be an option for Birth Control.
I’m attending this Free Fertility information event! Are you? Please look this up it may help answer questions that you have.
http://www.fertilityfocustelesummit.com
Dusty & Debbie Cook
You are in no way an outsider, Dusty. Comments from men are welcomed here anytime. With that said, I differ in opinion when it comes to permanent sterilization. I think that it is a good option. For some people. Clearly, I’m not one of those people as I’ve learned the hard way. Though undergoing a tubal ligation reversal is an option, it’s not for me. As far as having eggs harvested in lieu of a tubal ligation, I don’t know that it’s a viable option. So far, I haven’t found anything that says it is but it sounds intriguing.
Thanks so much for taking the time to read and comment on my post here at Our Mommyhood, Dusty. Have a great day.
Kristi, Live and Love Out Loud
@TweetingMama
Kristi {at} Live and Love Out Loud´s last blog ..Little Miss Mustang and a Possible Midlife Crisis
Thank you so much for sharing this. There is an unbelievable amount of pressure to be done having babies when you are expecting your 7th as I am. Right now, I am at peace with being done. We have a large family and I have my hands full. Our plan has been to have DH get the snip, but a teeny tiny part of me is unsure about doing anything permanent. I know that sounds insane to most people. I’ve asked DH to wait until the baby is a couple of months old. I just want to be sure. I think though, I may reconsider something less permanent. I appreciate your honesty and willingness to share your experience.
I can’t even begin to imagine the pressure and comments you receive from folks who think that 7 children is more than enough. No one wants to hear those comments. These aren’t animals you’re hoarding. These are children you wanted to give birth to, so I can certainly understand how that my hurt. Considering that you’re not 100% sure that you don’t want to expand your family further, I think it’s a great idea to hold off on taking any permanent measures. Though reversals can sometimes be successful, they’re not guaranteed and quite costly.
Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing your story. Congratulations on the upcoming birth of your new baby. What an exciting time! Have a great day.
Kristi, Live and Love Out Loud
@TweetingMama
Kristi {at} Live and Love Out Loud´s last blog ..Little Miss Mustang and a Possible Midlife Crisis
I’ve finally written my blog post about my tubal ligation experience (my original LENGTHY comment disappeared when my house had a power outage, grr). My sympathy goes out to those who’ve had it rough with deciding to have a TL or reversal. These feelings are so very real and specific to each person. I feel bad for those who decide to have a TL without ALL the proper information about them, the side effects, and regret. Here’s a link to my blog post … http://luckyredhen.net/?p=1051
Hi Lucky Red Hen,
I wanted to let you know that I did get a chance to read your post about tubal ligation on your site. I thought it was a great combination of facts, personal experience and humor. I certainly giggled. I tried to comment on the post, but clearly I arrived there too late as the comments were closed.
Thanks so much for taking the time to comment on my tubal ligation post here at Our Mommyhood…one month ago. I’m sorry for not responding sooner. I guess I need to check back on the comments on my articles a lot more often! Thanks again. Have a great day!
Kristi, Live and Love Out Loud
@TweetingMama
Kristi {at} Live and Love Out Loud´s last blog ..A Camera- GPS and Cleavage-Enhancing Bra- My Treasure Filled Purse
I’d like to hear comments on the side effects of the TL…….when I search online i see lots of negative side effects. Something i’m not willing to do….suffer from side effects that would take high and hell water to reverse. Anyone like to share how they felt?
Hi Sunnymommy! I’m sorry it’s taken a month for me to respond to your comment. Since this is an older post, I haven’t checked back on it here at Our Mommyhood all that often. To answer your question, the side effects I’ve experienced are heavy bleeding, increase in blood clots, severe cramping and fatigue during menstruation. I also feel emotionally/hormonally out of whack, like something’s wrong but I just can’t place a finger on exactly what it could be.
Thanks so much for stopping by and taking the time to comment…a month ago! Once again, I’m so sorry for not getting back to you sooner. Have a great day.
Kristi, Live and Love Out Loud
@TweetingMama
Kristi {at} Live and Love Out Loud´s last blog ..Small Business Spotlight- Tiny Giraffe Shop
“…my ability to carry life within me and bring it forth into the world was taken away at my choosing. The very thing I was created for, my purpose in this life, is gone and I’ve no one to blame but myself. Each and every day I live with the regret of my decision and the emptiness within.”
I’ve never been able to put it into words but this is exactly why I do not want to have a tubal ligation. I’m 28. My husband is almost 30. We are expecting #4 and I still cannot imagine going through with a procedure that would take away my fertility. Yes. I will have 4 kids this summer, but I’m still very young. So much can change in the future. I was created to bring forth new life. I’ve tried to explain it to my husband but he just doesn’t understand. He is terrified to have a vasectomy but he thinks I should be perfectly fine with a TL.
Hi Shannon! I think it’s very smart of you to really think things through before committing to undergo a tubal ligation. Since it is a permanent procedure (one that can be reversed, but not guaranteed to be successful), it’s important to really take some time to weigh the pros and cons and to be certain of your final decision. As for your husband’s feelings surrounding TL, I’ve found that most men just can’t wrap their heads around the emotional effects of undergoing something a TL. My husband doesn’t really understand why I feel strongly about having undergone the TL because in his mind it was the right thing to do to prevent me from being in so much pain before. I don’t think he understands that I’m still in pain. Emotional pain.
Thanks so much for stopping by and taking the time to comment on my tubal ligation post here at Our Mommyhood. I’m so sorry for not responding sooner. Since this article was published last month, I don’t check on the comments all that often. Sorry about that. Thanks again.
Kristi, Live and Love Out Loud
@TweetingMama
Kristi {at} Live and Love Out Loud´s last blog ..A Camera- GPS and Cleavage-Enhancing Bra- My Treasure Filled Purse
We’re planning a vasectomy after this baby is born, but I’m still so conflicted over it. My husband is happy to do it (he rightfully believes that it’s the least he can do after what three pregnancies has put my body through) but the closer we get to the date, the more I feel like I’m letting him neuter himself. He’s 31 and I’m (soon) 33, and that just feels too young to be permanently sterilized. I keep telling him – “what if we end up divorced? What if you want more kids with a future wife?” It may seem grim to some people (we’re perfectly stable) but I can’t help but think about the what-ifs.
But the fact is, I’m done with pregnancy and birth. DONE. And I don’t want to deal with birth control ever again. If there was an accident, I honestly don’t know what I’d do. I wouldn’t be happy about it, that’s for sure. So, while I feel fairly certain that I really am done bearing children, the idea of cutting up my husband’s insides just seems so extreme to me. But, I guess we’re going ahead with it. And I hope I don’t regret it.
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Hi Gina,
In hearing about Jolene’s birth less than hour ago, I felt a sense of happiness for you and sadness for me. Sadness that I won’t be experiencing another birth. And then it dawned on me…I should probably check on my tubal ligation article over at Our Mommyhood. Lo and behold, you left a comment here last week.
In reference to your concerns about your husband undergoing a vasectomy, I think it’s incredibly smart of you to look ahead and really question whether or not it’s this is a good option for you both. I certainly hope you’ll both be at peace with whatever decision you choose.
Thanks so much for stopping by and taking the time to comment on my tubal ligation post here at Our Mommyhood. Congratulations on the birth of your beautiful little girl. And congratulations for having the birth you wanted as well.
Kristi, Live and Love Out Loud
@TweetingMama
Kristi {at} Live and Love Out Loud´s last blog ..Small Business Spotlight- Tiny Giraffe Shop
I had my TL 9yrs ago, I have many health issues and had preterm labor with my youngest of two daughters. I am high risk and had a csection with her, and a tl immediately following. I had some regret right away. My father died suddenly last year, my desire for another child has intensefied greatly. My husband does not share my desire to have more children. I need to make peace with my decision. But how?
Making a decision that is right for you and your family is not always easy, we all face regrets. I am sorry that you are going through this situation! The risk of your family losing you and maybe even your baby is a big consideration. I know this decision is hard, but know that you are not alone. Loving yourself for making this decision, loving your family for wanting to you to be there for them, and most of all making the decision out of love is the most important things to remember. Sometimes the best decisions are not the easiest. Hugs to you and your family! This will get easier, it might now ever go away, but it will get easier!
Hi Joy,
I see that the Our Mommyhood editor has already responded to your comment, but I wanted to touch bases with you as well. I’ve struggled with having undergone a tubal ligation since day one and even after writing this post for Our Mommyhood, I continue to struggle. I don’t know how or if I’ll ever “get over it” and the fact that my husband has no desire to have more children hurts a bit too. I only hope that you and I (and so many others like us) will somehow find peace in our decision someday.
Thank you so much for taking the time to comment on my Tubal Ligation post here at Our Mommyhood. I’m sorry for not responding sooner. Thanks again.
Kristi, Live and Love Out Loud
@TweetingMama
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I had my third child last week, via emergency c section. I had my tubes tied after the surgery. I have regretted it every day since. I think I should have listened to my self instead of other people. Although, I am 36 I don’t think I really want to not have any more children. I am thinking heavily about getting a reversal already. My kids are 6, 11 months, and 7 days.
Hi Amy,
I’m 36 years old as well and even after writing this post about my tubal ligation regrets here at Our Mommyhood, I continue to struggle with my decision. I’m sorry that you are experiencing the same thing. It’s just unfortunate that doctors aren’t doing more digging before giving tubal ligations to women. So many of us regret our decisions and it’s just so unfortunate.
Thanks for taking the time to stop by and comment on my tubal ligation post here at Our Mommyhood. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate it. Have a great day.
Kristi, Live and Love Out Loud
@TweetingMama
Kristi {at} Live and Love Out Loud´s last blog ..Style Tips- Creating Affordable Style for Your Toddler
i am 32 years old and just had my 4th daughter. i got the tubal ligation done and didn’t realize till i was in the recovery room that it was the worst decision of my life. my husband wants a divorce because he was against it and wants a boy. at the time i thought it was the only answer to birth control. the pills and depo shots didn’t work for me since i had 3 of our kids while using them forms. i now don’t know what to do. I don’t want a divorce but it is hell trying to live with someone who can never forgive you. i would like to get it reversed but i don’t know if it will help at this point or not. it would be nice to have a little boy but in the same aspect i really don’t want 8 kids just to get a boy. being the one who supports the family i am just soo lost and confused. i agree, that the drs should discuss more with their patients about it. i hope i can find the right thing to do because right now i dont think it can get any worse.
Well just like some women I regret my TL. I am only 23 yrs old!I have two boys. In my case there was a lack of information on TL. Since day 1 Ive regret it I started crying right when the TL was done. I feel incomplete and pray for a miracle on my upcoming Tubal reversal. I wish TL was not an option for women under 40.
I am so sorry! I understand what you are saying. I hope things go well in your tubal reversal. It is so hard when we don’t have all the information we need to make such a life altering decision. Hugs to you!
My son is now 5 months old, born by C-section and I had TL during the surgery. I regret it. Only 5 months later and I’m looking to reverse it. I too had issues with my pregnancy. I am 35, it was my first. I had SPD, a lot of pain walking, couldn’t lift my legs up at all. Gestational Diabetes, Pre-eclampsia, and HELLP syndrome all caused them to perform an emergency C-section at 36 weeks. I told them I wanted TL because I wasn’t sure it was safe for me to get pregnant again. I’m so torn with my decision and I think about it so much. I think about it constantly and just wish I hadn’t done it.
[...] perfect. And he’s making my uterus ache for another little one. Maybe I should have my tubal ligation [...]