When Is The Right Time To Let Go?
September 3rd, 2010 | 
Author: By Mama M, Contributor, My Little Life (@5CrookedHalos)
I need to see a show of hands. All of you who’ve ever seen a child off to high school, raise your hands.
Okay, good.
Now that you’ve identified yourselves, let’s talk.
My baby. Well, not really my baby, but you know what I mean…metaphorically speaking (because he’ll always be my baby). He’s headed off to 9th grade and I’m freaked out!
I think what I’m most afraid of is knowing when to let go. Knowing when to just trust that I’ve done my job and that he will make good decisions. Lord knows I didn’t make good decisions when I was his age, so I’m hoping I steered him right.
Do I still call every parent when he says he’s going to their house, or do I trust that he is truthful and honest? And even if I do call every parent, how can I trust that they are truthful and honest?
Well all know of the parents who would fib and cover for us when we were younger. But how do I know which of his friends’ parents will be those parents?
And the girls? It’s starting. When I’m out and about, I’ve really been paying attention lately, and man alive, any girl who appears to be his age (which probably means they’re actually about 11…dang girls mature so fast!) sure pauses and looks when we walk passed.
Being that he’s walking right beside me, I can’t see all of the looking he does to the many girls we pass along the way. And honestly, I don’t really want to know.
So, experienced mamas, tell me your thoughts, ideas and advice. I’m all ears and eager to learn!!
How do you find a balance between being a careful, concerned mother and being overbearing and overprotective?
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My son is a year ahead of yours – he just started 10th grade, so I know just what you mean. It is so hard. I’M not ready for him to grow up, and it scares me to death (and makes me want to cry) to know that I only have 3 more years and then he will be off to college!
Our solution regarding the parties and trusting other parents has been that we encourage him to have his friends over to our house to hang out. They like to build a fire in the fire pit, toast marshmallows, eat and drink sodas and just hang out and talk. And flirt a bit. But it is all under our watchful eyes.
Good luck!
I so know what you are talking about. My son is starting 8th this year. The change is apparent and happening faster than I would like. I don’t think I will ever stop being that over protective mom. To me he is still that little boy that used to hold my hand. I am hoping that it is just a gradual thing where one day I will look back and realize how far I have come in the whole thing!
I am right where you are sister, my son just had his first 2 days of high school. I was a wreck most of this summer worrying about it. He is such a good kid- I was too, but went astray in high school and imagine all the crap I did, he will do too because it’s in his genes.
All the other blogs I follow are talking about their preschoolers and kindergartners so what a relief to find this post.
How do I find balance? Give myself a little credit for doing a decent job of raising him so far. I keep myself in check with my girlfriends who have been there done that or are going thru it too, Pray, Pray, Pray for guidance, and do my best to leave it in God’s hands.
I have had two graduate high school. One is now in the army. The second goes in army a year. 3rd started 7th grade, 4th in 6th grade and little one in nursery.
So yeah-know where you are coming from.
For me what helped the most was to remember that my kids lives are their journey not mine. I am there in a supp[orting role, hopefully I taught them right. The most important thing to remember is to constantly stress open communication. Let your kids now that should they ever get into a bind, you want them to come to you no matter what and that you are there for them.